2 OLD LADIES AND A CONDUM

TWO OLD LADIES ARE OUTSIDE THEIR NURSING HOME,HAVING A DRINK AND A SMOKE,WHEN IT STARTS TO RAIN. ONE OF THE OLD LADIES PULLS OUT A CONDUM,CUTS OFF THE END,PUTS IT OVER HER CIGARETTE,AND CONTINUES SMOKING.MAUDE;WHAT IN THE HELL IS THAT? MABEL:A CONDUM.THIS WAY MY CIGARETTE DOESN'T GET WET.MAUDE:WHERE DID YOU GET IT?MABEL:TOU CAN GET THEM AT ANY DRUGSTORE.THE NEXT DAY MAUDE HOBBLES HERSELF INTO THE LOCAL DRUGSTORE AND ANNOUNCES TO THE PHARMACIEST THAT SHE WANTS A BOX OF CONDUMS.THE PHARMACIEST,OBVIOUSLY EMBARRASSED,LOOKS AT HER KIND OF STRANGELY [SHE IS AFTER ALL,OVER 80],BUT VERY DELICATELY ASKS WHAT BRAND OF CONDUM SHE PREFERS,DOESN'T MATTER SONNY,AS LONG AS IT FITS ON A CAMEL.''